This is the plot of NEW MOON, credited to cuz she said it!!! soooo funny!

Bella and Edward are NOM NOM NOM in love.
Bella is afraid she is going to get too old for Edward.
Bella wants to be a vampire, Edward says "NO U"
Bella has crazy hemophiliac papercut at birthday bash at vampire's place.
Vampires go RAR RAR RAR.
Edward decides him and his family are not safe for Bella.
Edward leaves.
Bella cries.
Bella sits in chair for three months moping.
Bella discovers doing dangerous things makes her see Edward.
Bella is bat-shit insane.
Bella uses Jacob to make her motorcycles.
Jacob is usually shirtless.
Bella develops a relationship with Jacob.
Jacob breaks off relationship because he is a werewolf.
Bella resumes moping.
Jacob and Bella finally discuss werewolf-ness and vampire-killing.
Jacob leaves again.
Bella jumps off cliff and almost drowns.
Jacob saves her.
Alice appears.
Alice says Edward's gonna kill himself.
Bella and Alice go to Italy.
Bella stops Edward from walking in sunlight, thus causing a scene that would provoke the Volturi to snap some necks.
Dakota Fanning appears.
Dakota Fanning brings everyone to the Volturi.
Edward fights Volturi.
Alice says she sees Bella becoming a vampire.
Volturi seemed pleased by this and let them go.
Everyone goes back to Forks and decide Bella can be a vampire.
Edward is not amused.
Jacob and Edward have a cat-fight.
Bella says "NO U" to Jacob and picks Edward.
Edward demands marriage.
Movie ends.

Siriously, THATS IT.

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